Parenting the Teenager Who is Dating

 

mormon-parentsFollowing are seven tips for parents whose children have begun to date. They are from Ed J. Pinegar and Richard J. Allen, excerpted from a forthcoming book called, “What We Need to Know and Do.

  • Be a good example—The greatest gift that parents can give a dating son or daughter is to be loving with each other, and to demonstrate to the best of their ability how to cope with stress and solve problems—and still stay friends and devoted partners. This example gives the young person confidence and security to move forward. Single-parent homes can still teach the principles of coping with life’s problems and overcoming challenges successfully, while fostering cherished and exemplary memories.
  • Help set boundaries—Parents need to help the dating son or daughter establish wholesome boundaries and prudent protocols about what is appropriate and correct concerning hours to be kept and rules to be observed.
  • Help them build a strong foundation—This is a period of intense consideration of values and principles for life. The dating son or daughter needs help in coming to terms with governing principles such as honor, integrity, fidelity, commitment, selflessness, devotion to another, wholesome and healthful patterns of behavior, and cultivating a legacy for a new generation. This is the time to keep spiritual things in focus and remember the enduring gospel principles. Pray with and for your maturing children.
  • Encourage group dating—Group activities are best as the early dating game is cultivated.
  • Give guidance on feelings—Parents can help the dating son or daughter sort out the tricky emotions and understand the difference between infatuation and commitment for the long-term.
  • Teach self-reliance—Parents need to balance their intense concern for the well-being of their son or daughter with the need to start to let him or her move through the transition toward self-determination and maturity.
  • Provide a welcome setting—Make the home available to young people as they date. Make the home a gathering place where young people feel welcome to come as they criss-cross the community in search of pleasant diversions and opportunities to explore wholesome relationships.
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