The Utah Deseret News has published its choice of the top ten articles of 2011 on the family.

#10 — Raising Special Children

A 2009 National Health and Nutrition Examination Survey found that 13 percent of children met criteria for at least one of six mental disorders. Some have multiple issues. And there are far more than those six disorders to consider.

A Utah Easy to Love, Hard to Raise parent support group helps parents who have to cope with raising a special child while still functioning as parents of other children and people with vocations, hobbies, and dreams.   The organization was created by two such moms, who set up a blog: Utaheasytolove.blogspot.com and who meet with other parents in two Utah cities.   (Read more…)

#9 — Genealogy: Expanding the Family Tree

This year family history viewers have topped 149 million, based on website statistics from Compete.com, as users, typically aged 45 and older, seek out connections to relatives.

More than 100 million records will be made available this year via companies like Salt Lake City-based FamilySearch International, owned by The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Provo-based Ancestry.com Inc. and Palo Alto, California-based Archives.com. Part-time ancestral sleuths are turning to the Internet to find their progenitors, with companies trying to keep up with a growing market.  (Read more…)

#8 — Teen’s Dad Spends School Year Waving at Bus

Rain Price is a high school sophomore whose bus route changed so the bus would pass right by his house.  Every day, his dad showed up to wave at the bus — each time in a different costume.

“No recycling costumes, that’s the rule,” Price said. “I managed to adhere to that, and for better or for worse … we have some interesting costumes.” (Read more…)

#7 — Progress and Challenges for Women

…a new comprehensive report was recently released by the White House Council on Women and Girls — the first of its kind since a 1963 report by John F. Kennedy’s Presidential Commission on the Status of Women.

That commission, chaired by Eleanor Roosevelt, was charged with recommending ways to overcome “discriminations in government and private employment on the basis of sex” and point out services that would “enable women to continue their role as wives and mothers while making a maximum contribution to the world around them.”

The new report shows that women have made great strides, but that they still lag behind men in the workforce — in both pay and financial stability. (Read more…)

#6 — Marriage Gap Grows

The marriage gap is growing as co-habitation becomes the new norm.

Between 1960 and 2009, the number of nonmarital cohabiting couples — “sexual partners who are not married to each other but share a household” — in the United States increased more than fifteenfold, according to “The State of Our Unions: Marriage in America 2010,” produced by the University of Virginia National Marriage Project. About one-fourth of unmarried women 25 to 39 live with a partner and a similar number have done so in the past.

The full impact of this trend will not be felt for years, but many negatives are already showing up, especially where children are involved with co-habiting couples.  (Read more…)

#5 — Pro-life Movement Making a Comeback

For decades, Americans have argued over the morality and legality of abortion, in an emotionally heated and often intellectually clouded debate.

Yet this debate has reached a new intensity thanks to a wave of Tea Party and conservative Republicans who were swept into the U.S. House of Representatives and state legislatures November 2010.

In Washington, it has become a no-holds barred battle.  One fighting ground was the debate over funding to Planned Parenthood.  (Read more…)

4— The Age of Entitlement

A sense of entitlement…

isn’t just in preschool classrooms; it’s in homes, high schools, offices and even the highest levels of government. It impacts the way children treat their parents and siblings, interferes with education and can contribute to a lifetime of unhappiness, financial instability and disdain for work, experts say.

Entitled children and adults think they deserve to have everything their way, and that they shouldn’t have to do anything they don’t want to.  They have a very low tolerance for frustration, are impatient, and tend to raise their kids to be the same way.  (Read more…)

#3 — Blending Motherhood and Work

In the United States today, among mothers with children under 18 years of age, 71 percent of them are working, the highest number on record. In 1975 it was 47 percent.

While those numbers refer to mothers who punch a time clock or pull in a paycheck, any mother will tell you that motherhood is its own job — minus the public recognition, office perks or paid holidays.

American mothers who work are forced to be “supermoms,” but all eventually find that “doing it all” is taxing and daunting.  Most feel they are not getting to everything and shortchanging either home or work, or both. (Read more…)

#2 — Emerging Adulthood Changes Dating Rituals

Members of the LDS Church as well as people worldwide — young and old — are grappling with the question of marriage in a swiftly shifting society.

According to the U.S. Census Bureau, the median age for a man to marry is about 28 and a woman 26 — a figure that has been on the rise for the last few decades — with members of the LDS Church consistently getting married about two to three years earlier than the national average. Earlier this month at the LDS General Conference, President Thomas S. Monson and other church leaders encouraged young single Mormon men to more actively pursue matrimony.

Some studies have shown that since women are striding out in education and career opportunities, men are lengthening their youth and waiting to make commitments such as marriage.  Thus, even in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, where marriage and family are of central importance, young people are waiting much longer to marry.  (Read more…)

#1 — Fatherless America

One third of American children have no father in the home.

In the past 50 years, the percentage of children who live with two married parents has dropped 22 points. During that same time, the number of babies born to unwed mothers jumped from 5 percent to 40 percent.

Studies show that a father’s influence is important for children, and has been linked to profound emotional, physical, and psychological milestones in development.  “Several leading sociologists have labeled father absence ‘the most pressing issue facing America today.’” (Read more…)

* Top Ten Deseret News Stories of 2011 on Family Life

Additional Resources:

Threats to Marriage and Family

The Church of Jesus Christ on Marriage and Family

Basic Mormon Beliefs and Real Mormons

Valerie Steimle is a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (a “Mormon” woman). She has been writing as a family advocate for the past 20 years. She is the mother of nine children living in southern Alabama and is the author of four books and a weekly newspaper column, Thoughts from the Heart.

Valerie Steimle is a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (a “Mormon” woman). She has been writing as a family advocate for the past 20 years. She is the mother of nine children living in southern Alabama and is the author of four books and a weekly newspaper column, Thoughts from the Heart.

Real family entertainment is difficult to come by at times. As a parent, we check to make sure whatever we watch, read or listen to is tame enough for our children. Raw language, over dramatized violence, and inappropriate relationships seem to be the norm in our culture. Sometimes, it’s even snuck in children’s full length feature cartoons. As members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, we pay particular attention to the rating, language content, and violence of movies as we have been admonished by our church leaders.

This past year was a pretty good one for good, clean, uplifting movies. Some good examples of inspiring movies are: Soul Surfer, A Dophin’s Tale, Hugo and even Gnomeo and Juliet. No inappropriate language, no over dramatized violence and no nudity or inappropriate relationships. The stories were interesting and uplifting as well.

How can we tell for ourselves and then guide our children on which movies are appropriate to watch as well as interesting, showing the correct example and moral principles? The movie making business unfortunately, for the most part, is not family friendly.

LDS quote and guidelines new strength of youth pamphlet

Back in March 31, 1930, the Motion Picture Association of America approved what was called, “The Production Code”. This code had three general principles.

1. No picture shall be produced which will lower the moral standards of those who see it.

2. Correct standards of life, subject only to the requirements of drama and entertainment, shall be presented.

3. Law–divine, natural or human–shall not be ridiculed, nor shall sympathy be created for it’s violation.

What a far cry that is to the kind of movies we have today. This type of entertainment has taken its toll on our attitudes in life.

Did the movie “Pearl Harbor” truly portray what happened in history or did it change the story a bit to smooth over relationships with other countries? What about the movie “Titanic”? How are we to feel compassion for Rose’s situation, when she runs away from her family and has sex with a guy she just met a few days before? The historical recreations are changing what we normally visualize as evil for good and it is having a noticeable affect on our children.

In an NBC “In Depth” news report by Mike Belcher on October 19, 1995, teenagers of different backgrounds and lifestyles were questioned about what they watched at the theater. To these adolescents, “violence was perceived as normal” and it was common to see “women in sexual situations”.

Is this what the American public see in their everyday life? I would say not. But through the movies being produced today, we are reinforcing our own stereotypes. We know that in our day-to-day life, most people never see the kind of violence that is shown in the films we watch at the theater. Yet these violent, sex-ridden movies are popular and are supposedly reflecting the kind of life we have in this country.

In a speech delivered on May 5, 1995 to the University of Toronto, Canada, Michael Medved said, “We hear the cries of Hollywood, who say ‘we are just reflecting reality, don’t blame us’”. But as Mr. Medved points out “if the rate of murder from TV and movies were applied in reality, then in just 50 days, everyone in the United States would be killed.”

This is the kind of entertainment our youth are watching. This is not reality but what other people want to characterize as good entertainment. What kind of future will we have with this reinforcement of a false reality?

A report from U.S. News and World Report, September 11, 1995 said “a psychologist, Leonard Eron of the University of Michigan’s Institute for Social Research, has tracked 650 New York children from 1960 to the present, looking at viewing habits and behavior. Those who watched the most violent television as youngsters grew up to engage in the most aggressive behavior as adults, from spouse abuse to drunk driving.”

Thinking of the most popular films of the day, the future looks pretty bleak. But it doesn’t have to be that way. We can choose to watch family oriented movies that are entertaining too. In fact according to what Michael Medved said in his speech, “the G and PG rated movies have done better on average than the R-rated movies by a ratio of more than two to one.” This was before the PG-13 rating came out. As parents, it is up to us to keep tabs on the movies our children watch. An “R” rating should be a warning sign for inappropriate watching material.

At times we seem to swing back and forth in our praising of Hollywood from good family entertainment, like the movie Soul Surfer, to the violence of Bourne Identity. Somehow we have to get the message across to those making films that families want good movies with descent moral values and no gratuitous violence. Let the good be portrayed as good and the evil be evil. Uplifting movies will strengthen families in a positive way. Our future depends on it.

Additional Resources:

Strengthen families by watching uplifting movies and media. Learn more at the official site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (inadvertently called by friends of other faiths as the “Mormon Church”).

Attend a local meetinghouse and discover in person what Mormon believe.

Valerie’s website: Strengthen Your Home.

By Amy Choate-Nielsen

Deseret News
Published: Sunday, Jan. 15, 2012 7:00 p.m. MST

David Letterman knows how to get a laugh.Like most comics, he riffs on the day’s news, deadpans the camera and revels in audacity.”Oh, did you hear about this?” the host of CBS’ Late Show with David Letterman asked his audience recently. “A campaign staffer on the Newt Gingrich campaign was fired because he was making negative comments about Mormons. I thought, now, wait a minute — isn’t Newt in favor of multiple wives?”
Laughter rumbled from the audience followed by applause. The polygamy punch line is a familiar one when it comes to poking fun at Mormons — as though Mormons and polygamy are synonymous in mainstream media. Ironically, the practice that’s most linked to Mormons is a practice most Mormons oppose, according to a groundbreaking new study of Mormons in America released Thursday by the Pew Research Center‘s Forum on Religion and Public Life.

According to the study, members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints unequivocally reject polygamy — only 2 percent said the practice is morally acceptable — evidence of a yawning gap in what Mormons believe and how they are perceived. Mormons’ opinions are overwhelmingly conservative, the study shows, but in many ways, their views are also surprising — especially when it comes to opinions on moral issues, divorce, homosexuality and polygamy.

Morality

Mormons also take a significant stance on moral issues in other areas, such as divorce, sex outside of marriage and consumption of alcohol.

Although teachings from the LDS Church emphasize the importance and eternal nature of the family, only 25 percent of Mormons surveyed said divorce is morally wrong, according to the study. That means Mormons are slightly less morally opposed to divorce than the general public.

“For Catholics, divorce does not exist. They think it is not only wrong but it is impossible,” said Matthew Bowman, member of a board of expert advisers to the Pew Research Center for the study and author of “The Mormon People,” a book on the history of the LDS Church. “That has not been true for Mormons. There is theological space for divorce within Mormonism. It is undesirable, but Mormons recognize it is sometimes necessary and sometimes the right thing to do.”

Other moral views revealed in the survey — 54 percent said drinking alcohol was morally wrong, compared with 15 percent of the general public — set Mormons apart, Bowman says. The assumption on the part of non-Mormons is that if Mormons think drinking alcohol is wrong, then they must think everyone who imbibes is morally flawed. That apprehension can make people suspicious of Mormons, and wary of an elitist attitude, he says.

Differences in moral viewpoints can create a stumbling block for Mormon acceptance — not only in high-profile arenas, such as a presidential election, but also in communities.
“What you find throughout the report is a tension,” said David Campbell, assistant professor at Notre Dame and an adviser on the study. “Mormons like to use the phrase, ‘Be in the world but not of the world.’ They are certainly living their lives in the world. They are active and involved in their communities, but they have these beliefs and practices that set them apart a little bit, and sometimes there is conflict.”

Homosexuality

Mormons have some of the most conservative opinions when it comes to homosexuality. The survey asked Mormons if homosexuality should be accepted by society or discouraged by society, with an option for neither, both or “don’t know.” The response — 26 percent said homosexuality should be accepted, 65 percent said it should be discouraged — puts Mormons as the least likely to say homosexuality should be accepted by society. But a 26 percent acceptance rate, with roughly 1 in 4 Mormons saying homosexuality should be accepted, might be surprisingly high to some.

Of particular interest is the fact that only 8 percent of Mormons surveyed identified themselves as liberal, and 66 percent said they were conservative. That means some of those who said homosexuality should be accepted also identify themselves as politically conservative, Bowman says. That distinction illustrates the complexity of Mormons’ opinion on sexuality — that it is rooted more in religious precepts than politics.
Still, it’s difficult to draw a conclusion about Mormons‘ views on homosexuality based on the study, says Pew Research Center adviser Terryl Givens, professor of literature and religion at the University of Richmond.

“Results need to be viewed cautiously,” Givens says. “Official LDS pronouncements insist there is a distinction between (sexual) orientation and behavior, but the survey blurs that difference, probably leaving many Mormons unsure how to answer that question. What is clear, however, is that Mormons are trending toward greater acceptance of same-sex relationships, just as society as a whole is, although by a much smaller percentage.”

Polygamy

At one point 120 years ago, some Mormons practiced plural marriage, hence the association between Mormons and polygamy. The practice was discontinued in 1890, but the cultural association persists, perhaps in part because Mormons are sometimes confused with members of the Fundamentalist LDS Church, a polygamist group not affiliated with The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

In the October-November 2011 study of a national sample of 1,019 Mormons, 86 percent said polygamy is morally wrong. That’s a number that surprises Bowman.

Were it not for the confusion surrounding Mormons and the FLDS Church practice of plural marriage, Bowman says that statistic might not be as high.

“It’s my experience that Mormons have a fraught relationship with polygamy,” Bowman said of the study results. “There is a sense that rejecting polygamy identifies a member of the LDS Church and distinguishes us from the fundamentalists. That is a cultural signifier as much as a theological statement.”

Some who responded to the survey, 11 percent, said polygamy is not a moral issue.
Email: achoate@desnews.com

A recent The Pew Research Center‘s Forum on Religion and Public Life conducted an in-depth survey of Mormons in the United States. Mormon is a nickname sometimes used to describe members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. The fourth article in a series that appears in Deseret News is evaluating the results of this survey and providing context for the results.

Immigration is a controversial topic in the United States. The survey asked one question on this topic. They were asked which of two statements most closely matched their view, even if they didn’t completely agree. They were asked whether immigrants strengthen or burden the nation. No distinction was made between legal and illegal immigration, leaving those polled to decide for themselves what the question meant.

In the general U.S. population, 45 percent of Americans feel that immigrants strengthen the country, while 44 percent burden it. 12 percent feel that neither or both are true or they have no opinion on the subject. Mormon views closely mirror these statistics. 45 percent of Mormons also believe immigrants strengthen the nation, although a smaller number, 41 percent, consider them a burden on society. The number of Mormons who accept both or neither or who have no opinion is higher, at 14 percent.

These numbers put them at odds with evangelical Christians, one of the few political areas in which they disagree. Within the white evangelical population, 59 percent believe immigrants are a burden, and 27 percent believe they strengthen the country. Like Mormons, 14 percent answered both, neither, or no opinion.

The statistics for Mormons shows a strong divide based on age, income, and education, as well as on religious commitment. Only 36 percent of highly committed Mormons see immigrants as a burden, while 50 percent of those who are less committed see them as a burden. This largely correlates with economic status. 84 percent of Mormons who are highly committed to their religion are college graduates. (The church strongly encourages education, which may be a factor in this.) Only 50 percent of those with high school educations are strongly committed to their faith. This statistic is very unusual in the religious world. For most religions, the least educated are the most religious.

49 percent of Mormons under age 50 see immigrants as a strength. 39 percent of Mormons over 50 see it as a strength.

Beyond the study’s statistics, several other factors influence the Mormon view of immigration. Many Mormons serve missions for their church. For two years, they live wherever they are sent, learning the language and living as the people in that community live. They go into the homes, attend the churches, and do service work in addition to their missionary work. Many of those serve in Spanish countries and have a realistic view of the hardships faced by those people. They come home with a compassionate view of the world and an understanding that Americans have much easier lives than most. The love missionaries almost invariably develop for the people they served influences their views on immigration.

Finally, the church has taken very specific stands on the subject of illegal immigration in recent years. Mormons believe God has sent a prophet to lead His church, just as He has always done in ancient times, and so, Mormons are asked to sustain the prophet as the leader of the Church. Official statements from the prophet or the Church are considered to be from God.

The Church officially endorsed the basic principles of the Utah Compact, a law working to create a balanced legal approach to immigration. In November, 2011, L. Whitney Clayton gave an official statement from the church in honor of the first anniversary of the bill. The statement said in part:

The Utah Compact is consistent with three principles we believe should be carefully balanced when considering immigration:

• We follow Jesus Christ by loving our neighbors. The meaning of neighbor includes all of God’s children, in all places and in all times.
• We recognize an ever-present need to strengthen families. Families are meant to be together. Forced separation of working parents from their children weakens families and damages society.
• We acknowledge that every nation has the right to enforce its laws and secure its borders.

We continue to encourage lawmakers everywhere to consider laws that properly balance love of neighbors and the importance of keeping families together, within the framework of just and enforceable laws.” (See Utah Compact One-Year Anniversary Marked by Utah Community Leaders.)

The official Mormon position is to encourage its members to stay in their homelands or to immigrate legally, but once they are here, however they came, they are to be treated with love, dignity, and respect, and laws should not separate families.

For a more in-depth look at the issue of Mormons and immigration, read the Deseret News article: Mormons’ immigration attitudes set them apart, by Eric Schulzke, Deseret News, published: Saturday, Jan. 14, 2012 8:12 p.m. MST.

Of all the numbers in the Pew Research Center’s recently released survey of “Mormons in America,” the highest, most overwhelming numbers are these: 98 percent of respondents said they believe in the Resurrection of Jesus Christ, and 97 percent say their church is a Christian religion.

This comes on the heels of earlier surveys indicating that 32 percent of non-LDS U.S. adults say the LDS Church is not a Christian religion, and an additional 17 percent are unsure of LDS Christianity. The theological and semantic reasons for this can be complex, but for the 1,019 self-identified Mormons who participated in the Pew survey, their theological position is clear: Mormons believe in Jesus Christ, and they consider themselves to be Christian.

“Certainly in Latter-day Saint theology is this idea that if you understand who you are, you understand that there’s a purpose in life, you understand your connection to God, that certainly has an impact on how you live your life and what you do, but also how you feel about your life and what you are doing,” said Michael Purdy of the LDS Church Public Affairs office.

For the vast majority of Latter-day Saints surveyed, those life choices have much to do with their religious beliefs. Eighty-two percent of survey respondents indicate that religion is “very important” to them, 83 percent say they pray every day and 77 percent say they attend church at least once a week. Beyond that, a stunning 69 percent of respondents fit all three descriptions, saying that religion is very important to them, that they pray every day and that they go to church every week.

“By this measure,” the report says, “Mormons exhibit higher levels of religious commitment than many other religious groups, including white evangelical Christians.”

Part of the explanation for these high numbers may be that the survey focused only on those who self-identified as Latter-day Saints.

“The method they used tended to identify people who are strongly committed,” said BYU sociologist Marie Cornwall , who advised the Pew Forum on the new survey. “They don’t have the people who are kind of marginal. But that’s okay; we just have to be careful with the way we interpret the findings.”

One such finding is the relationship between religious commitment and education among Mormons.

David Campbell, a University of Notre Dame associate professor and another adviser on the survey, noted that the more educated respondents were, the higher their levels of religious commitment.

“I was a little surprised by that,” said Campbell, who is LDS and who has extensively studied on the role of religion in the public square. “The more educated a Mormon is, the more likely they are to be wholehearted in their commitment to the church and its teachings.”

That is different from other churches, he said, where more education tends to lead to more religious skepticism.

Pew Research Center officials also noted “a significant gender gap in religious commitment, with more Mormon women than men exhibiting a high level of religious commitment (73 percent vs. 65 percent).”

According to the Pew report, a similar “gender gap” is seen among the general public. A 2007 survey found 36 percent of U.S. women exhibited a high level of religious commitment, compared with 24 percent of men.

One series of questions asked about what it means to be a good Mormon. According to the respondents, in order to be a good Mormon it is “essential” to believe Joseph Smith saw God the Father and Jesus Christ (80 percent), work to help the poor (73 percent), hold regular family home evenings (51 percent), not drink coffee and tea (49 percent) and not watch R-rated movies (32 percent).

Combining those who said “essential” with those who said “important but not essential,” the order changes a little bit: working to help the poor (97 percent), holding regular family home evenings (96 percent), believing Joseph Smith saw God the Father and Jesus Christ (93 percent), not drinking coffee and tea (81 percent) and not watching R-rated movies (79 percent).

“I think that result is rather interesting,” said Cornwall. “Mormons are known for not drinking coffee or tea and not watching R-rated movies. But compared to believing that Joseph Smith saw God and working for the poor, Mormons don’t seem to focus on the coffee and tea as much as people probably think.”

Other manifestations of religious commitment in the survey included:

The number of respondents (65 percent) who say they hold a current temple recommend (a certificate from local ecclesiastical leaders, issued every other year, indicating that an individual has permission from the church to enter LDS temples and participate in temple rites and sacraments)

The number (79 percent) who say they pay tithing (donating 10 percent of their income to the church)

The number (27 percent) who have served full-time missions for the church (this number includes 43 percent of men and 11 percent of women and varies significantly according to the age and education of the respondent, as well as whether or not the respondent was raised Mormon)

The number (82 percent) who keep food in storage for emergencies or disasters, as they have been counseled to do by LDS Church leaders (This number includes 23 percent who say they have three months’ worth, 35 percent who say they have more than three months’ worth and 23 percent who say they have less than three months’ worth)

The percentage who pay tithing is especially interesting to break down. According to the survey tabulations, “tithing is most common among Mormons with the highest levels of religious commitment (96 percent) … fully 91 percent of college graduates say they pay tithing … compared with 66 percent of those with a high school diploma or less education. And among those whose family income exceeds $30,000, 83 percent say they pay tithing, compared with 69 percent of those with incomes of less than $30,000.”

While previous surveys have clearly established LDS agreement with certain key Christian doctrines — 90 percent of Mormons believe in God, 91 percent believe the Bible is the word of God and 98 percent believe in life after death — the new survey explores Mormon confidence in points of doctrine that are unique to LDS theology. And in these points of doctrine, Mormons proved to be unified and believing. They believe overwhelmingly that God and Jesus Christ are separate physical beings (94 percent), that the president of the LDS Church is a prophet of God (94 percent), that families can be bound together eternally in temple ceremonies (95 percent) and that the Book of Mormon was written by ancient prophets and translated by Joseph Smith (91 percent).

Overall, 77 percent say they believe “wholeheartedly” in all of the teachings of the LDS Church. That number increases to 82 percent among Mormons ages 18-49, and to 85 percent among Mormons who are college graduates.

“Ultimately, I suppose other Americans will judge our church — and perhaps all churches — by their relevance in how they touch and improve human lives right here on Earth as well as what they offer in the life to come,” wrote Michael Otterson, Public Affairs director for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, in his “On Faith” blog in the Washington Post. “Meanwhile, we welcome the friendship and regard of all groups, even as we retain our commitment to a unique identity. In the end … Latter-day Saints will strive to be good Mormons, true believers, kind neighbors and faithful friends.

Pew Study Reflects Mormons’ Religious Commitment to Christ, Mormon Beliefs in Tithes and Temples

Mormons in America

SMITHFIELD — After dinner, three baths, four bedtime stories and a half-a-dozen goodnight kisses for 2-year-old twins Brock and Isaac and 6-year-old Ellie, Erin and Brian Thompson finally sink into the couch with weary smiles.

Being parents is just what they always wanted. And they love it.

“Of course we have our crazy moments,” Thompson says, “but for the most part we just try to find the good things in the day and remember that they’re only going to be little for so long.”

As members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, the Thompsons believe that maintaining a strong marriage and raising and teaching children are essential keys to happiness and their most important responsibilities on earth.

In fact, 81 percent of Mormons say being a good parent is “one of the most important things in life,” according to a new survey by the Pew Research Center‘s Forum on Religion & Public Life — the first survey of Mormons about Mormons, by a non-LDS research organization.

The survey of more than 1,000 self-identified Latter-day Saints from across the country asked how accepted Mormons feel in American culture, as well as their thoughts on religious practices, political issues and family roles.

The survey showed that Mormons are more likely to be married than the general population, 67 percent of the sample size compared to 52 percent of the general public.

And 85 percent of married Mormons married other Mormons. Protestants marry other Protestants 81 percent of the time and Catholics marry each other 78 percent of the time.

With an emphasis on marriage, it should come as no surprise that the Mormons surveyed also had, on average, more children (2.6) than the general U.S. population (1.8).

Thompson grew up wanting to have a large family and be a good mother, but she and her husband have struggled with infertility for nearly nine years — a trial punctuated by the joys of two different adoptions, Ellie, then the twins.

“We said when we finally get to be parents, we’re going to actually sit down and take a little more time to focus on our kids,” Thompson said, who lives in northern Utah. “I’m not saying that other people don’t do that — the perspective we have is just a little different.”

Other Latter-day Saints share the Thompson’s enthusiasm to put family first.

“Family is at the core of our faith,” says Jane Clayson Johnson, a Latter-day Saint and former anchor of CBS’s “The Early Show” who prefers the title of mom to two young children and stepmom to three older ones. “There are so many distractions today that all force us outward, away from core relationships. What our faith does is turn us back toward deep, rich, meaningful relationships in families.”

“It teaches us that families are where we find meaning,” continued Clayson from her home in Boston. “The work I do in my family is the most important work that I’ll ever do.”

Among the general public, 50 percent list being a good parent as “one of the most important things in life,” with 44 percent listing it as “very important but not most important.”

That shouldn’t be taken to mean that the average American doesn’t value marriage or family, just that they don’t “go to church every week and get told that’s what they’re supposed to do,” says Marie Cornwall, a professor of sociology at Brigham Young University. Cornwall advised the Pew Center for this survey.

“There’s nothing to suggest that family life is less valued in the United States over time,” she said, “but there’s more that suggests that people are feeling like it’s not possible for them to attain that.”

The pressure comes when a “successful” marriage is defined as having a good job, a hefty retirement account and a lovely home with a white picket fence, Cornwall said. So when people can’t achieve that in today’s tough economy, many feel like they’ve failed.

“For Mormons, there’s a spiritual aspect brought to that (definition of success),” she said, “an effort, in terms of sermons, to try and downplay the material and place more emphasis on the relationships.”

When the survey asked Mormons about working arrangements in families, nearly six out of 10 Mormons indicated they would prefer a marriage where the man works and the woman stays home to care for the home and the children.

LDS college graduates liked this marital structure more than any other subgroup, with 71 percent of them preferring the man to work and the woman to stay home.

In the general population, only 30 percent of Americans would prefer a marriage where the husband works and the wife stays home. Among religiously unaffiliated Americans, it drops to 15 percent who would pick such a scenario.

Almost four-in-10 Mormons would prefer that both parents work and both parents help with child rearing and housework.

For American Fork mom Ruth Ann Dupaix, 37, it’s not a black-or-white decision. Throughout her marriage she has both worked and stayed at home.

“The way we look at it, we try to make it a partnership,” Dupaix says. “It’s more who’s able at the time to do it best. It’s working together, a give and take.”

When she and her husband, Geoff, were first married, her job helped pay for his school. When he finished, she kept working because her employer would pay for her to complete her degree, and education was important to both of them.

Dupaix stopped working when her sixth child was born but has recently gone back to work at a local grocery store three nights a week to help fulfill a family goal to reduce their debt load.

It’s a big pay cut from the job she used to have at a bank, but it’s a more family friendly schedule.

“As part of a family you make sacrifices,” she said. “I’m gone when the kids are asleep, but I’m still here during the day when they need me.”

Additional Resources:

For original source Deseret News article: Mormon family marriage focus Pew.

Mormons in America Pew Study.

As the “Mormon moment” extends into 2012, the Pew Research Center’s Forum on Religion & Public Life today released a groundbreaking new survey, the first ever published by a non-LDS research organization to focus exclusively on members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and their beliefs, values, perceptions and political preferences.

Entitled “Mormons in America: Certain in Their Beliefs, Uncertain of Their Place in Society,” the survey was conducted between Oct. 25 and Nov. 16, 2011 among a national sample of 1,019 respondents who identified themselves as Mormons. The results validate a number of long-held stereotypes (most American Mormons are white, well-educated, politically conservative and religiously observant) while providing a few interesting surprises (care for the poor and needy is high on the list of LDS priorities, while drinking coffee and watching R-rated movies aren’t as taboo among the rank and file as you might think).

“While this survey comes amid a contentious election campaign, it is not solely or even chiefly about politics,” said Luis Lugo, Pew Research Center director, in the published survey’s preface. “Rather, we hope that it will contribute to a broader public understanding of Mormons and Mormonism at a time of great interest in both.”

For example, in one very interesting section of the new survey, respondents were asked several questions about what is essential to being a good Mormon. According to the survey, 80 percent said “believing Joseph Smith saw God the Father and Jesus Christ” is essential to being a good Mormon, 73 percent said “working to help the poor,” 51 percent said “regular Family Home Evenings,” 49 percent said “not drinking coffee and tea” and 32 percent said “not watching R-rated movies.

“To be honest, I found the strong sentiment that ‘working to help the poor’ is essential to being a good Mormon refreshing and a little surprising,” said David Campbell, an LDS Church member who is an associate professor at the University of Notre Dame and who consulted with the Pew Research Center on the new survey. “As a Mormon, I would hope it would be that way, but I wasn’t sure what to expect. It’s good to see the church’s genuine compassion for the poor and needy reflected in these numbers.”

People outside the church may or may not be aware of the LDS propensity for compassionate service and other . According to the survey, 62 percent of Mormons think that Americans are generally uninformed about Mormonism, and 68 percent feel that they are not viewed as part of mainstream American society. But they remain optimistic, with 63 percent expressing the belief that Mormonism will eventually become part of mainstream society and 56 percent saying that the American people are ready for a Mormon president.

In fact, optimism is one of the themes to emerge from the survey relative to Latter-day Saints. Some 87 percent say they are satisfied with the way things are going in their own life, and 92 percent say their respective communities are excellent (52 percent) or good (40 percent) places to live (this is especially true among Mormons in Utah, of whom 71 percent say their communities are excellent).

But evidently, optimism only goes so far with Mormons.

“I think it is interesting that the respondents are overwhelmingly positive about their communities. They love their communities and everything’s fine there,” said Marie Cornwall, professor of sociology at Brigham Young University and another advisor to the Pew Research Center on this study. “But when you ask them about the way things are going in the country today, they are overwhelmingly (75 percent) dissatisfied. You would think that their satisfaction with their personal lives would factor into their feelings about how things are going in the country, but there seems to be a total disconnect there.”

It should be noted that the Mormon view of how things are going in the country today closely resembles the view of the American public as a whole, among whom 78 percent said they were dissatisfied in an October 2011 Pew Research Center survey.

Generally speaking, the new survey looks at Mormons and their perspectives in four key areas: politics and ideology, religious beliefs and practices, cultural and moral issues and family life.

Politically, there are few surprises. Most Mormons (66 percent) describe themselves as politically conservative, and 74 percent of Mormon voters identify with or lean toward the Republican Party. Philosophically, 75 percent of respondents said they prefer a smaller government providing fewer services to a bigger government providing more services.

Among a number of politicians currently in the spotlight, Mitt Romney is a favorite, being viewed favorably by 86 percent of all Mormons and 94 percent of Mormon Republicans. Even among Mormon Democrats, 62 percent rate Romney favorably.

The other Mormon running for president, Jon Huntsman, is viewed favorably by 50 percent of Mormon voters, while President Barack Obama is viewed favorably by 25 percent — slightly ahead of the rating Mormons bestowed upon another one of their own: Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (22 percent).

Interestingly, Latter-day Saints seem to be somewhat divided on the issue of immigration. They are fairly evenly split on whether immigrants strengthen the U.S. because of their hard work and talents (45 percent) or burden the U.S. by taking American jobs, housing and health care (41 percent).

Campbell, who is an expert in the field of religion, politics and civic engagement, said he wasn’t surprised by that result.

“Although Mormons are caricatured as being really right wing, on the issue of immigration they are not,” he said. “The church itself has been quite a voice of moderation on this issue, and that has resulted in Mormons being more positive toward immigrants than other conservative religious groups tend to be.”

Campbell suggests that the LDS Church’s missionary program has something to do with that, with Latter-day Saints tending to develop a broader worldview as a result of their missionary service around the world. In any event, he said, “this result really does cut against the stereotype.”

In terms of religious beliefs and practices, the survey makes it clear that Mormons are highly religious — again, not a big surprise. Eighty-two percent say that religion is very important in their lives, and 77 percent say they believe wholeheartedly in all of the church’s teachings. Fully 83 percent say they pray every day, 79 percent say they donate 10 percent of their earnings to the church in tithing and 77 percent say they attend church at least once a week. According to Pew, “Mormons exhibit higher levels of religious commitment than many other religious groups, including white evangelical Protestants.”

Looking at basic, core religious beliefs, 98 percent say they believe in the resurrection of Jesus Christ, 94 percent believe the president of the LDS Church is a prophet of God, 95 percent believe that families can be bound together eternally in temple ceremonies, 94 percent believe that God the Father and Jesus Christ are separate, physical beings and 91 percent believe that the Book of Mormon was written by ancient prophets.

Clearly, Mormons are believers.

But are they Christian? Ninety-seven percent of Mormons think so. And when asked to volunteer the one word that best describes Mormons, the most common responses were “Christian” and “Christ-centered.” By way of contrast, a November Pew Research Center survey found that nearly half (49 percent) of non-Mormon U.S. adults say that Mormonism is NOT Christian or that they are unsure whether or not it is Christian. In that same survey, when respondents were asked for one word that best describes the LDS Church, the most commonly offered response was “cult.”

Culturally, Mormon conservatism extends to a wide variety of moral issues. Polygamy (86 percent), sex between unmarried adults (79 percent), abortion (74 percent) and drinking alcohol (54 percent) are viewed as morally wrong. Divorce, on the other hand, is largely considered “not a moral issue” by respondents (46 percent).

Similarly, 65 percent of respondents said that homosexuality should be discouraged by society, compared with 58 percent of the general public who say homosexuality should be accepted by society.

“Mormons like to use the phrase, ‘Be in the world but not of the world,’” Campbell noted. “They are active and involved in their communities, but they have these beliefs and practices that set them apart a little bit, and sometimes that creates conflict or tension. [Homosexuality] is one of those issues where, rightly or wrongly, Mormons just have a different position than most of the rest of America.”

The survey also illustrates how important family life is to most members of the LDS Church. Among life’s priorities, being a good parent (81 percent) and having a successful marriage (73 percent) place higher than career concerns, having free time or even living a religious life. Some 67 percent of Mormon adults are married (compared with 52 percent of the general public), and 85 percent of them are married to another Mormon.

“As the Church and its members are increasingly the focus of media attention, we’re eager to participate in conversations that help the public get to know us better,” said LDS Church spokesman Michael Purdy. “Even though the recent Pew study did not survey any of the Church’s eight million members who live outside the U.S., it highlights some important aspects regarding who we are and what we believe.

“For example,” Purdy continued, “the study found that Church members subscribe to traditional Christian beliefs, have high moral standards, are overwhelmingly satisfied with their lives and communities, are active in serving others and have a profound dedication to family. These results reflect the Church’s message that a deep commitment to the teachings of Jesus Christ brings lasting happiness.”

Speaking for the Pew Research Center, Lugo said the idea for the survey was born last summer, “around the time that a Newsweek cover story and a New York Times article declared that the United States was experiencing a ‘Mormon moment.’”

“That got us thinking,” Lugo said in the survey’s preface.

Over the years, numerous polls have gauged public attitudes toward Mormons, who make up about 2 percent of all U.S. adults. But what do Mormons think about their place in American life? With the rising prominence of members of the LDS Church in politics, popular culture and the media, do Mormons feel more secure and accepted in American society? What do they think about other religions? What do they believe, how do they practice their faith and what do they see as essential to being a good Mormon and to leading a good life?

An advisory panel was recruited to help the Pew Forum staff create the survey. The panel featured a number of Latter-day Saints who have professional experience in Mormon studies and research, including Campbell, Cornwall, Matthew Bowman of Hampden-Sydney College, Terryl Givens of the University of Richmond and Allison Pond of the Deseret News.

“We helped them to formulate the questions, and to frame them in the kind of language that Mormons use,” Campbell said.

After a period of testing, the survey was conducted among respondents who identified themselves as Mormons (it also included qualifying questions that made it clear that respondents were members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints as opposed to other churches whose members may refer to themselves as Mormons).

“Since Mormons represent about 2 percent of the population, you’d have to call 98 people before you’d get a Mormon, and that would be very expensive,” said Cornwall, who is also editor of the Journal for the Scientific Study of Religion. “But they had a fancy way of finding Mormons, including going back to Mormons they had found in the course of doing previous surveys, so they were able to get their sample in a cost-effective way.”

Care was also taken to make sure the survey included those who had land lines as well as those who have only cell phones — a growing area of concern among those who conduct public opinion research today.

Among other interesting findings of the Pew Forum’s survey of Mormons:

• 71 percent of respondents reside in the American West, including 53 percent who live in the Mountain states and 34 percent who live in Utah;

• 88 percent are white, 7 percent Hispanic, 1 percent black and 4 percent other racial and ethnic backgrounds;

• 50 percent say that evangelical Christians are generally unfriendly to Mormons;

• 54 percent say that the way their religion is portrayed on television and in movies hurts society’s image of Mormons;

• 57 percent of Mormons said that most or all of their close friends are other Mormons (this number was significantly higher in Utah, where the number climbed to 73 percent);

• 65 percent of respondents say they hold a current temple recommend;

• 27 percent say they believe in yoga not just as exercise but as a spiritual practice;

Pew Study on Mormons in America

• 11 percent say they believe in reincarnation;

• 74 percent were raised in the LDS Church;

• 59 percent of converts cite the church’s beliefs as the main reason they joined the church;

• 59 percent of converts joined the church between the ages of 18 and 35;

• 27 percent have served a full-time mission, including 43 percent of men and 11 percent of women;

• 82 percent say they have a supply of food in storage, and 58 percent keep at least a three-month supply.

The margin of error for the survey is =/- 4.5 percentage points.

“I think this survey is a really good summary of the hyper-committed Mormon community that shows up at church every week,” Cornwall said. “I’m not sure it captures Mormons on the margins very well, but that’s OK — hopefully we can do that the next time. Meanwhile, this is a pretty good picture — and an interesting picture — of Mormons.

By Joseph Walker, Deseret News

Additional Resources:

Full original source Deseret News article: Pew Study on Mormons in America.

Learn more about the results of this survey of Mormons in America.

See infographic from the Deseret News article.

Pew Mormon Study Highlights Christianity.

Valerie Steimle is a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (“Mormon”). She has been writing as a family advocate for the past 20 years. She is the mother of nine children living in southern Alabama and is the author of four books and a weekly newspaper column, Thoughts from the Heart.

Valerie Steimle is a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (“Mormon” woman). She has been writing as a family advocate for the past 20years. She is the mother of nine children living insouthern Alabama and is the author of four books and a weekly newspaper column, Thoughts from the Heart.

As a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (or Mormons) we focus a lot of our attention in church attendance. The more we attend church together as a family, the more we can learn important communication skills and ponder fundamental beliefs and doctrines. Church attendance helps families to be a better family.

For example, according to a U.S. News and World Report on September 9, 1996 called “Can Churches Save America,” “the divorce rate for regular churchgoers is 18 percent; for those who attend services less than once a year, 34 percent.”

Religious beliefs help keep a perspective in life which points us in the right direction and encourages and gives us hope through our trials.  Some families consider going to church a waste of time as they cannot feel how it will help.  But if you stop and think about it, there are great things church attendance can do for families.

Attending a church or synagogue service consistently with your family makes the difference between wonderful relationships and troubled times in family life; it’s n ot that everything will be perfect; it’s that a faith-based life adds a dimension and a power that enters a family in relation to the other.  Belief in God empowers; revelation through prayer guides. Each certainly helps the cause of keeping the family together.  From my own personal experience, I have seen how attending church regularly and abiding by its precepts can help pull families through difficult times.

It is amazing what attending church can do for people.  There are countless stories of drug addicts, thieves and alcoholics who could not clean up their life until introduced into a program with God at the helm.  They turn themselves around and become clean and sober, hard working citizens.  By the same token attending church as a family reminds us of a higher force in our life and that we can pray for help.  From that same article (“Can Churches Save America”) in U.S. News and World Report says, “Frequent churchgoers are about 50 percent less likely to report psychological problems and 71 percent less likely to be alcoholics.” As families, we need a consistent, stable source of emotional stability and consistent church attendance can provide this kind of security.

From our highest authority, we find one of the best reasons to attend church is from the Lord. From modern revelation in these latter days Joseph Smith, the first latter day prophet of the hurch of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (inadvertently called “the Mormon Church” by the media), wrote in Doctrine and Covenants section 59, verses 9-10 the Lord tells us how church attendance helps our families: “And that thou mayest more fully keep thyself unspotted from the world, thou shalt go to the house of prayer and offer up thy sacraments upon my holy day; For verily this is a day appointed unto you to rest from your labors, and to pay thy devotions unto the Most High.”

If we have faith in God and know He takes care of us, attending church once a week can help keep our families moving forward in the right direction.

Think about these reasons for attending Church and building your faith in Jesus Christ:

1. Going to church or synagogue service gives you one opportunity to be together as a family in a positive setting each week.  Busy schedules and other obligations during the week keep us going in opposite directions from each other.

2. We hear positive messages for improving our life.  It might be boring sometimes; it might be hard to sit still, but the messages we hear at a service each week provide a positive, spiritual direction.

3. Religion can help us keep our perspective.  It’s easy to forget what’s important in life when we are making a lot of money or climbing the corporate ladder of opportunity or immersed in some project that takes up all our time.  Attending a service once a week breaks your concentration from the rest of the world and allows you to contemplate on what’s really important in your life.

Yes, I would say church attendance definitely has a positive affect on families.  So the next time it seems as if your life is out of control, you haven’t really visited with your spouse and children, or your children seem like they are always in trouble, set aside some time during the week to attend a church or synagogue service.  It will help you keep your sanity and the positive affects on your family will surprise you.

Additional Resources:

Learn more about the benefits of church attendance at the official site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (inadvertently called by friends of other faiths the “Mormon Church”).

Attend a local meetinghouse.

Request a free copy of the Book of Mormon.

Valerie’s website: Strengthen Your Home.